Why I Refuse to Network

I have always felt uncomfortable with the concept of networking and, frankly, I’ve always felt that I’m bad at it. I hate small talk, I get overwhelmed by large events, I hardly remember my best friends' birthdays let alone that potential client I once met, and I don’t like to ask people for help. I’m better at it now than I used to be, but the thought of building relationships on the premise that they might be able to do something for me just never sat right.

And yet one day not so long ago, one of my colleagues exclaimed that I have a huge network. I was a little taken aback at first but when I started to think about it, I realized that she was right. I actually do have what you might describe as a large network of interesting people, and a small deep network, many of whom would be considered experts in their fields and all of whom are awesome. I love to collaborate with other people and organisations on various projects, I have way more meetings per week than actually fit into my calendar and I actually genuinely really really like most of the people I come into contact with through my work, in fact some of them are now my friends.

So, what happened? And why hadn’t I seen it in that way before? Subconsciously, I guess, I had always just thought of my “network” as my “community”. And now, as a result, I am starting to think of “networking” as “solidarity”. And it isn’t just a question of semantics. Thinking of it like that has not only made me feel a whole lot more comfortable with it and it is changing the way I approach it.

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