Handing Over Power
I am wildly excited that at the beginning of this month, Dr Hedda Ofoole Knoll officially replaced me as Managing Director at tbd*. What does that even mean for a self-organised company? On the one hand, not that much. The role is effectively symbolic, as required by German law. On the other hand, to me, it means everything.
For the company it felt like a necessary step to complete the internal power shift we started over two years ago, and to give the team a chance to build a truly radical and truly equitable structure. As a co-founder of the company, I was still holding the (by now) largely symbolic role of Managing Director, and this was nudging me, the team and our partners to retain certain historical power dynamics, which we were determined to erase. I am deeply serious about systemic change and for me, binary power relations are first against the wall.
Having said that, I know that in Hedda tbd* has a symbolic figurehead with a truly unique energy, passion and perspective. Since joining the team last year, she has made demands of me and the rest of the team that have challenged and triggered me, but above all have helped me to grow and learn. She has become a great friend and mentor, who I admire deeply. She is leading the pack when it comes to belonging, anti-discrimination, anti-racism, intersectional feminism *at work* and so much more. If you want to see what she is up to, and benefit from her expertise and wisdom, check this out. The wonderful Nicole, my co-founder, will remain in the role of Managing Director alongside Hedda for the next six months to help with the transition, before she too steps down.
As a sidenote, we offered Hedda her job at tbd* in early 2020, during her second pregnancy, knowing that she would soon go on leave for several months. We proposed to her the role of Managing Director whilst she was still on parental leave. And nothing about it ever felt wrong, or scary. Even though, or perhaps precisely because, she agreed to everything only under strict conditions of radical flexibility, radical allyship, and radical family-friendliness. Only suddenly, once in place, these conditions didn’t feel all that radical anymore. They just felt right. It felt like this was the future and we had just created it.
On a personal note, this transition gives me the chance to take a step back, review my own role, wean myself off the hustle and adrenaline that has fed me for the last eight years, and find a new way of being. One that might allow me to #fixthesystemnotthewomen without burning out. But not just that. One that allows me to dedicate a larger chunk of my time to family, femininity and fun, all things I considered frivolous for too long.
And there is one more thing. When I look at my own role in society, and how I use my power and my privilege as a cis, white, middle-class woman, I know that it is no longer enough to want to use my privilege for the greater good — my motivating force since deciding to work in the impact sector at 21. Now I want and need to give up power and create space at the table for others. This is something different. It’s uncomfortable. It actually feels a lot harder than I expected. But I am determined to try. Not least because it is what I long for from cis, white, middle-class men: Move over; make space; Give. Up. Power. Just as I suspect that my privilege would allow me to gain power in other companies, in other institutions, in other relationships far more easily than others, I know that for cis, white men it is the same. Power is not finite. Power is not lost. Once shared, it will multiply. Giving up doesn’t necessarily mean going down. It can even mean liberating yourself from deeply engrained societal expectations, in order to build a truly free life. That’s one of my hypotheses anyway. In fact, exploring and understanding Power is one of the things that I will be dedicating myself to over the next months, and maybe even years. I believe that presenting and prototyping alternative visions of power is a fundamental cornerstone of the systemic change we need in order to create a more just and equitable world for everybody. Here are some of the articles that I have written on this topic [How Much Privilege is there in Purpose, It’s Simple Until it’s Not, White Supremacy is Hiding in Every Meeting]. Watch this space.